"April is the cruellest month, breeding
Lilacs out of the dead land, mixing
Memory and desire, stirring
Dull roots with spring rain.
Winter kept us warm, covering
Earth in forgetful snow, feeding
A little life with dried tubers".
- T.S. Eloit
Sometimes it can just feel easier to hunker down against the softening of Spring - the old hurts, resentments and pain can feel reactivated with warmth and nourishment, rain and sun. The pain is real - but only temporary. The heart that is hoping to open again and you canwork against the cynicism of memory. Here are three tools to use in opening up:
1) Decide to be compassionate for yourself instead of being disappointed or angry with yourself. You would have done things differently if you could have, and in the future you will.
2) Talk to someone safe about your pain. Get support from a professional if needed.
3) Notice the pain but don't become the pain. Your heart is bigger than the pain you are feeling. You can get past this.
Cheryl Deaner, LMFT